Sometimes, Travel is a Total Shit Fest

Sometimes, Travel is a Total Shit FestOkay, so I wouldn’t describe my recent trip to Arizona a shit fest per say, but. There were definitely some hiccups. And hiccups that I couldn’t just scare away ya know.

So, to start off, getting to and from AZ was A MISSION. Just LET ME TELL YOU.

So, we left at like 2PM meaning we drove almost all damn night and didn’t arrive until 3:30AM.

SO FUN RIGHT.

Lots of gas station stops and some casual peeing-on-the-side-of-the-road stuff too. Because we gotta keep it classy AF up in here.

And then we slept in the parking lot of Horseshoe Bend until sunrise. Ok well – a little after because we were so so damn sleepy.

Horseshoe Bend at Sunrise in Page, Arizona[Classic tourist pic – thanks to Sabrina for being a bomb ass photog]

And Horseshoe Bend was gorgeous! BUT. I wasn’t like OMG WOW. I think it was kind of ruined by how much I’d seen it on Instagram, to be honest. It just looked like the photos I’d seen, to me. And I knew exactly what to expect – there were no surprises.

We pretty much just took our photos and left. It didn’t leave a mark on me, I didn’t feel any sort of connection to it. Which bums me out, because it really IS such a beautiful place. I’d just been numbed to it since I’d seen that same exact picture a million bajillion times. And sometimes I get into this “must see all the things” mentality and forget to slow down and appreciate a place for what it is. I really need to make a conscious effort to do that more.

Horseshoe Bend at Sunrise in Page, Arizona[It really is beautiful, though! Check out how small my girl Sabrina looks in the upper right hand corner]

However, I really encourage sunrise views, just because I’ve heard it gets crazy crowded at sunset. Although I’m sure sunset has its own magic – SO. Pick your poison, I suppose.

Anyways. Then onto Upper Antelope Canyon! And it was absolutely beautiful, but knowing what it was, I wouldn’t go again. It was crowded and extremely stressful, and I didn’t feel like I had a chance to appreciate it at all like I’d wanted. I’ll go more into that in a separate post.

Upper Antelope Canyon in Page, Arizona[Upper Antelope Canyon was so so pretty, but also not really worth it]

And Havasupai was amazing of course! I’d wanted to go for so so so long – in fact, I’d wanted to go on this entire trip for so so long.

But, for whatever reason – it wasn’t really everything I had hoped for. It was beautiful, and fun, but my friend and I both just felt off for whatever reason. And it was a fun trip, but it probably won’t go down in history as one of my favorites.

Waterfall in Havasupai, Arizona[The waterfalls were super pretty, but this was taken at the peak of my flood worries]

And that is to no fault of anyone, just the circumstances. It was a bummer seeing all the pack mules. It rained on us the latter half of the first day and quite a bit of the second (and one of the Supai people alluded that it COULD FLOOD and I was like WHAT since I knew they had flash floods July-Sept and went into overthinking mode since we’d have no reception). Everything got muddy and we didn’t really feel like swimming after getting back from Beaver Falls, so we just hung out in our tent for the rest of the night. We were more tired from hiking than we’d anticipated (and both were not in the best of shape!) and got a ton of blisters. We were stressin’ about whether or not we should do the confluence. I am not the biggest risk taker, but my friend is, so that created a little bit of tension (I went into “mom” mode lol, never did I think I’d be that person…).

The Trail into Havasupai in Arizona[When we were hiking and blissfully unaware that shit was about to hit the fan]

And then, once I reached the car at the trailhead, shit went down. I couldn’t find my keys, and figured I must’ve dropped them somehow on the trail – that led to 2 hours of being on the phone and trying to figure out how the hell we were going to get out of there (we had dying phones, barely any reception, and were two hours away from any sort of civilization).

I was approaching breakdown mode and not gonna lie, started to cry – and promptly found my keys. Somehow I’d forgotten that I’d moved them to another pouch in my bag? And then. My check engine light went on, which had never happened before, and we were 2 hours away from cell service! AHHHH. Luckily everything was fine, but then we almost ran out of gas.

Havasu Falls in Havasupai, Arizona[Sigh, even though this trip was stressful, views like this made it worth it]

So it was one of those trips where it was one thing after another, and we were both just pretty over it.

And it made me think about travel and happiness and experiences. I’ve known this, of course, everyone says it – but you really can’t escape your anxieties and life doesn’t immediately become this perfect little bubble when you’re out traveling.

All of my favorite travel memories had to do more with the amazing experiences I’d had there, rather than the place itself (although it definitely does help if you’re somewhere beautiful!). You can be in the most beautiful place and still not have the BEST TIME EVER like everyone on social media is apt to believe.

Beaver Falls in Havasupai in Arizona[I tried to be artsy AF here; cacti in front of Beaver Falls; this is right before the rain started to pour down from the heavens]

And even though I’d been dying to go to this beautiful amazing place since FOREVER and I imagined I’d never want to leave and that 2 nights would be nowhere near enough time – I was honestly SO ready to leave. I was actually excited to come home and relax. Who the hell am I? Is that sad? Is that called #adulting? Have I turned into an 80 year old lady overnight?

…And I’m trying to answer that last question as I’m home alone on a Friday night, debating if I should make my potato and carrot soup for the week tonight or tomorrow. I think this answers that.

BUT ANYWAYS. It just really hit home that travel isn’t always what you imagine it’ll be. It’s full of bumps, some you’ll laugh about later and some you might not. Trips don’t always go exactly as planned – sometimes the weather or your forgetful ass have other ideas. AND THAT’S OK.

Beaver Falls in Havasupai, Arizona[A close up of Beaver Falls; it really was as beautiful as I’d expected, so that was koo]

I just keep learning, over and over, to drop my expectations. To live in the moment and be thankful for what I am experiencing, even if it’s rain and shitstorm. And I’m grateful for the shitty times because then I really really appreciate when things are going RIGHT.

I’m not really sure how to end this, other than: just get out there. Go do shit. If it doesn’t end up how you wanted or pictured, that’s fine. Accept it, move on, and do some more shit.

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